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escaped_monkey's Journal

14th October, 2004. 2:36 am. "Foundations of Anal"

Foundations of Anal she said.
Seriously, I said.
Yeah, she said.

Christ on a stick. Foundations of Anal. That's hilarious, I couldn't sit through a lecture titled "Foundations of Anal" without cracking up. I mean, I can hardly order two breasts of chicken at the local take-away without a giggle. Honestly, "two breasts"... how is that ever NOT funny? And the worst part is, I order that every night of the week. Sometimes the lady behind the counter says she's only got one breast, and then I just can't bring myself to say the word "breast" again. I'd explode if I did. So I ask for chips and get out of there as quick as I can. Chips don't have any hidden meaning or sexual connotations, they're just chips... and I'm thankful for that. With chicken you've got breasts and legs... even the giblets look like some horribly mutilated penis. It's almost as embarassing as asking for condoms at a chemist.

Boots was the first store to put the condoms on the shelf, which minimised the embarassment of buying them. You could complete the entire transaction without saying the word "condom", in fact you needn't say anything... just hand over the cash and then you go have sex with somebody, easy-peasy. But with chicken, we're still in the stone age. You've got to march right up there and demand a pair of breasts. Where is the sense in that?

Quote of the day: "Foundations of Anal"

Current mood: sleepy.
Current music: Jimmy Eat World - Your House.

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